Ah, here I am!

#solTuesdays

For the last 30 years or so, here’s where I’ve come to be me, the me that questions, that is unsure. The me who finally relaxes as she takes off the facade, the always-striving-to-get-it-right wife or the this-family-is-gonna-love-each-other-if-it-kills-me mom. This has been my quiet place, where I’ve retreated and recharged for years and years. The place and the people here have helped keep me sane. 

In this land of “we love you no matter what”, I didn’t have to hide my exhaustion. I didn’t have to pretend everything was okay. I didn’t have to be someone I wasn’t. To be fair, the amazing sister who lives here has done the same by phone for a bazillion years, too, but there is something about being here that has restored me, time and time again. She and her family always welcome me here.

I wish it didn’t take me so many years, a divorce, a quiet period and intense reflection to get me to reconcile who I am. I finally put the pieces of the real me back where they belong. Along the way my friendships have strengthened, teaching became easier (even as it got harder), my reflection has deepened, and my relationships with my kids have changed in ways I didn’t anticipate.

I believe that because I am finally living my truth, being the real me, I met and married the person who has proven to be the greatest blessing in the second half of my life. We bring joy, silliness, and laughter to each other’s lives. We appreciate who the other person is, and love unconditionally. We’ve discovered that along with our separate interests, we have some things in common, one of which is the peace we find when camping.

Should you meet us out there while we are camping, expect to find two imperfect people who are focused on living their truths. One of those truths is that life really IS too short. Find the joy where you can, before you are unable to enjoy what life can bring. Go camping. Walk in nature. Hug a friend or a pet or a tree. Find what makes you happy.

I hope you can get to this place faster than I did. But however long it takes you to get here, you will be welcome.


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