Centered On… Centering?

2/3/26 #wherewerv, #solTuesdays

In my One Little Word (OLW) practice this year, I chose to work on centering. (See here and here.) In order to BE centered, I believe I need to understand what that means before I figure out what that looks like to me. (And how to do it already, for Pete’s sake. And focus on the process, not the product.)

I begin as I often do when I am trying to figure something out – research. According to Diana Rabb in Psychology Today (online), centering means this.

Centering usually refers to our mental and physical state of mind. It’s the place we know we have to get back to when we’re not feeling like ourselves. When we’re not centered, we might feel lost or out of touch with ourselves. When we center ourselves, we bring calm to our emotions. We do so by slowing down our breathing so that we “feel” more of what’s going on around us. Becoming centered is a way to find peace within the chaos that might be surrounding us. It’s about being “in check” with what’s going on. Individuals who are centered are typically calm and peaceful.

Rabb, Diana. 2020. What Is Centering? What Is Grounding. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-empowerment-diary/202002/what-is-centering-what-is-grounding

The third (or fourth?) time I read this paragraph, this sentence jumped out at me:  Becoming centered is a way to find peace within the chaos that might be surrounding us. 

THIS. This is what I want to be able to do. This really is the focus for my year (for my LIFE), and what I hope to write about periodically this year. As I write this, I’m thinking that finding peace within the chaos is NOT the same as avoiding the chaos (something that just does not work). Over the last decade or so, I’ve experienced periods just full of chaos, some of my own making, but a lot out of my control.

• Divorce,
• Mom’s cancer diagnosis,
• the loss of a second cousin (the first in 2002, the second in 2016),
• my young boys growing into young men with all the chaos surrounding that,
• the death of first my mom, then Greg’s mom, then my dad – all within 18 months,
• the youngest of our kids being diagnosed with a seizure disorder,
• the loss of other relatives and family friends,
• the terrible things going on in our country right now…

There are more, but you get the point. Most of these exist outside of my control. And because of the way I am wired, through most of these I experienced a range of anxiety, some severe enough to affect my sleep, appetite and energy. Been there, done that, don’t want to repeat it. (Again. Seriously, I’m done with the way I feel when anxiety is screwing me up.)

In the past I’ve tried to avoid or block out the chaos, so it’s time to try something new. While I’m not sure just what that is yet, I do know gratitude will be a part of it. I am SO grateful I’m finally in a healthy relationship, with a partner who understands, appreciates, and loves me just as I am. This gives me a steadier platform from which to find my balance (last year’s OLW) and focus on finding the peace within the chaos. More on this another day.

What are you grateful for today?

I didn’t have to shovel!

Faith

Our cats

Being able to visit family.

This past trip

My kid with one of his kids

Christmas pears. Yum!

Family dinners

Hobbies Greg shares with me…

…and this one.

(I’m in it for the food & the company!)

This one we created together.

Camper in the shop – went for rides instead.

Just some of my gratitude list!