Tuesday, July 12
I just put the invitations in the mail, ones I wish I didn’t need to send. They are for the memorial service we can finally have for Dad, who passed away at the end of March, 2020 (not from Covid, ironically). Although I’m not quite done, a large stack went in today’s mail.
Before that I called people to find out who is still around to be invited to the Celebration of Life/Memorial service.
Before that I made lists from Mom’s phone book, lingering over her unmistakable cursive, muttering that she didn’t note when people died.
Before that (yesterday, in fact) I opened the box of invitations that my sister made, marveling at how I can be simultaneously happy and sad.
Before that I froze the three kinds of cookies I made for the memorial service: applesauce, oatmeal raisin and sugar cookies. (The chocolate chip will be made later.) All his favorites.
Before that I wiped away the tears when Greg said my dad would have loved the cookies I made. That’s my grief this week- happy and sad.
WhereWeRV 
The description of the cookies and the food captures your love for your father perfectly ❤️
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I know this grief but can’t imagine having it postponed due to the pandemic. I hope it helps provide closure. I can so relate to seeing your mom’s handwriting. My mom had beautiful handwriting and I love when I come across it. I know those cookies were made with love.
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Closure is a weird word, but it’s true that is part of what I need. That and a chance to laugh (and cry) with those who miss him, too.
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Often times we forget that memorial services are not for the deceased but for family and friends giving them the chance to share in the laughter and tears of a life well spent.
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Yes, this! I missed this so much!
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First of all, I love that picture of your dad. What a smile.
It’s also interesting to me that you connect your feelings of grief with baking. That really struck a chord for me. Baking is such a heartfelt act, and when I make the favorites of those who have passed on, it gives me a space to think about them fondly as I work. But it’s bittersweet, for sure.
Sending you and your family strength.
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Lainie, I appreciate your comments. Just this weekend I made a chicken spread that my mom always, always made for get-togethers, and I found the dish she always used to serve it in.
Bittersweet is a good word for that.
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